{"id":1440,"date":"2015-05-29T12:08:03","date_gmt":"2015-05-29T11:08:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.actnocturnal.com\/?p=1440"},"modified":"2022-02-12T21:22:47","modified_gmt":"2022-02-12T20:22:47","slug":"samokontrola","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/samokontrola\/","title":{"rendered":"Self-control"},"content":{"rendered":"

No. No. No. No. Let’s – no.<\/p>\n

What is its\u00a0job after all? What’s the point of my present NO<\/em>? Greater\u00a0good? Because this present YES<\/em>\u00a0appear to know what it’s doing, and that NO<\/em>\u00a0for\u00a0the sake of future credit seems so irrelevant. Do I have to say NO<\/em>? And if not, why I am\u00a0saying\u00a0NO after all<\/em>?<\/p>\n

What is self-control really? I recently read that the only thing we\u00a0can control in our\u00a0life is\u00a0– ourselves. Not weather. No our work. Not\u00a0others. Just ourselves.\u00a0And then there is the question why<\/em>? Because you know the\u00a0phrases: enjoy the moment, you only live once, screw tomorrow\u00a0and so on. And I think I told\u00a0life to go to hell too many times that I\u00a0have to stop and\u00a0wonder why<\/em>.<\/p>\n

All right. I get it. I have that discipline – workout regularly\u00a0and you’ll get abs. Honestly, it’s not abs at all\u00a0(although they are not bad to own). It’s the\u00a0head that simply feels good after a certain physical effort. That made me enjoy the pain with\u00a0a\u00a0military discipline. And it’s not pain<\/em>\u00a0exactly. Probably there is a certain amount of dopamine that\u00a0has the chemical reaction to blah, blah\u00a0whatever\u00a0(if you know what it is, please don’t bother explaining – I get it). Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.<\/p>\n

So how do you know exactly when to say NO<\/em>?<\/p>\n

Eating ice cream when you’re overweight? No. No. But everybody’s\u00a0eating it. Have one, why you’re being such a pussy\u00a0and other tricks. But no\u00a0(and here is where NO<\/em> just converted to YES<\/em>). At least, I don’t know how to say NO <\/em>to an ice-cream\u00a0(that’s why I exercise I guess). Because it seems\u00a0like that YES<\/em> determines the level of enjoyment\u00a0(sweet sin).<\/p>\n

And what or who determines enjoyment? Is the belly full of wasps the reason that\u00a0makes us want to “fall for it”? That one cigarette, one more glass, rolling dice, and even adultery? Do we pay with our head for those small sparks of instant happiness? And what are those temptations like? Is\u00a0temptation – enjoyment? What exactly is a certain balance of what we may\u00a0or may not\u00a0do? 10 cigarettes? 5? Taking a week off from exercising? Stopping at just flirting<\/em>?<\/p>\n

\"what<\/p>\n

For the sake of self-control it’s always necessary to have a specific purpose or a goal (eg. lose weight by summer). In doing so, it is good to have a plan and a strategy for self-control (eg. sweets are out and you\u00a0exercise 3 times a week). And then we come to the swallowing of\u00a0temporary unpleasantness that leads to higher goals instead of settling down\u00a0for\u00a0current reward.\u00a0And there it is – that second when you\u00a0break to\u00a0say NO<\/em> and keep saying NO<\/em>\u00a0for the\u00a0next few minutes – that one second determines your self-control. That\u00a0hour while sweat\u00a0pours down\u00a0you and you wonder why the hell you needed all this in your life, determines the level of your commitment. Discipline. Demolition of established habits.\u00a0Only… I do not know if I learned how important it is. I don’t know will I ever learn. Do\u00a0long-term plans have an impact on me at all. Does this mean that I’m immature? Or just means that I\u00a0have to practice self-control my\u00a0entire life?<\/p>\n

Promises. First thing on Mondays. Tomorrow. Just this once. I will never do it again. And\u00a0for\u00a0me, the most difficult moment – to find the reason to say NO<\/em>. The reason to refuse that damn, creamy, delicious ice cream that melts in your\u00a0mouth.<\/p>\n

It seems that self-control is choice of emotion then. Yeah, I’m gonna feel good while doing exercises because I know that it’s good for me. I’ll be proud because I turned down that delicious treat. Because when I look back after all that, I’ll see how my NO <\/em>was\u00a0worth it. I\u00a0may not see it immediately, but it doesn’t mean that I won’t. Self-control is the perspective. Recognizing the perspective while you still absolutely don’t feel anything other than pain<\/em>.<\/p>\n

And that’s the point I guess. What looks like pain or causes immediate frustration due to the inability to act, is only a temporary obstacle on a road to better tomorrow. I need to say NO<\/em>\u00a0because of tomorrow. To make tomorrow better. So tomorrow would be 100\u00a0times\u00a0nicer than if I\u00a0immediately said\u00a0YES<\/em>. Because the enjoyment is\u00a0better after 100 days of not eating ice cream. Because the reward is higher after sacrifice. After establishing control over ourselves. After knowing that we finally have power over something. Over our\u00a0NO<\/em> and our YES<\/em>. Over the decisions that will mark us tomorrow too.<\/p>\n

That’s why today\u00a0instead of why not<\/em> – let\u00a0me\u00a0say NO<\/em>. Ice cream will be delicious tomorrow too. And if there’s no ice-cream, I missed it out for myself. The only person I\u00a0need to respect in life.
\n<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

No. No. No. No. Let’s – no. What is its\u00a0job after all? What’s the point of my present NO? Greater\u00a0good? Because this present YES\u00a0appear to know what it’s doing, and that NO\u00a0for\u00a0the sake of future credit seems so irrelevant. Do I have to say NO? And if not, why I am\u00a0saying\u00a0NO after all?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":12181,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"amp_status":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":true,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"Self-controlSamokontrola http:\/\/wp.me\/p54f1f-ne","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1440","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-price"],"yoast_head":"\nSamokontrola<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Samokontrola: Koja je poenta mog sada\u0161njeg NE? 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Ja \u0107u to da radim s tobom ili bez tebe, a ovako mo\u017eemo oboje da zaradimo neki dinar. Bila je ru\u017ena. 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Vrati\u0107u i\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "PRI\u010cE"","block_context":{"text":"PRI\u010cE","link":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/category\/price\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/pexels-emre-can-2079223.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/pexels-emre-can-2079223.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/pexels-emre-can-2079223.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/pexels-emre-can-2079223.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/pexels-emre-can-2079223.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":13162,"url":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/1000-zasto-0-zato\/","url_meta":{"origin":1440,"position":3},"title":"1000 Za\u0161to, 0 Zato","author":"Ana Gord","date":"10.06.2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Za\u0161to su raskinuli?\u00a0Za\u0161to je silovao?\u00a0Za\u0161to je napustila decu?\u00a0Za\u0161to ne moz\u030cemo normalno da pri\u010damo? Za\u0161to je ba\u0161 od svih bolesti korona postala pandemija?\u00a0Za\u0161to je udario \u017eenu?\u00a0Za\u0161to je dobila rak?\u00a0Za\u0161to me on\/a ne voli?\u00a0Za\u0161to se ovo ba\u0161 meni des\u030cava?\u00a0Za\u0161to je prevario devojku?\u00a0Za\u0161to je ostavila dec\u030cka?\u00a0Za\u0161to gleda Zadrugu?\u00a0Za\u0161to glasa za koga glasa (na\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "PRI\u010cE"","block_context":{"text":"PRI\u010cE","link":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/category\/price\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/C3B5C51B-B220-41C4-B0FA-DEF6DAE9BF11.jpg?fit=960%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/C3B5C51B-B220-41C4-B0FA-DEF6DAE9BF11.jpg?fit=960%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/C3B5C51B-B220-41C4-B0FA-DEF6DAE9BF11.jpg?fit=960%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/C3B5C51B-B220-41C4-B0FA-DEF6DAE9BF11.jpg?fit=960%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":11362,"url":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/dobro-delo-ne-cini-coveka\/","url_meta":{"origin":1440,"position":4},"title":"Dobro delo ne \u010dini \u010doveka","author":"Ana Gord","date":"25.12.2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Dragi Deda Mraze, Bila sam dobra cele godine. U\u010dini ne\u0161to za sebe U oktobru, pored mene je pro\u0161la \u017eenska moto banda na trotinetima. U pono\u0107, na miholjsko leto. Pro\u0161le su pored mene, njih tri, na trotinetima, odguruju\u0107i se stopalima o tlo. To nisu bili elektri\u010dni trotineti a opet, bile su\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "PRI\u010cE"","block_context":{"text":"PRI\u010cE","link":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/category\/price\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/white-heart-prints-863908.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/white-heart-prints-863908.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/white-heart-prints-863908.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/white-heart-prints-863908.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/white-heart-prints-863908.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":9101,"url":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/prakticni-marketing-saveti-za-pisce\/","url_meta":{"origin":1440,"position":5},"title":"Prakti\u010dni Marketing Saveti Za Pisce – Koji Pale I Na Doma\u0107em Terenu","author":"Ana Gord","date":"23.10.2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Ako \u010ditate ovaj tekst, velika je verovatno\u0107a da ste napisali knjigu ili ste mo\u017eda ve\u0107 i pro\u0161li kroz ceo mukotrpni proces objavljivanja - bilo preko izdava\u010da ili u samostalnoj verziji... \u0160to je, znam vrlo dobro, oduzelo ne samo dosta vremena ve\u0107 i sve va\u0161e \u017eivce. A taman kad ste pomisli\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "o pisanju"","block_context":{"text":"o pisanju","link":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/category\/pisanje\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/shutterstock_673506763.jpg?fit=1000%2C667&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/shutterstock_673506763.jpg?fit=1000%2C667&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/shutterstock_673506763.jpg?fit=1000%2C667&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.anagord.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/shutterstock_673506763.jpg?fit=1000%2C667&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1440","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1440"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1440\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14397,"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1440\/revisions\/14397"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12181"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1440"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1440"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.anagord.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1440"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}